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Emily Cassel (she/her) is a Soulful Business + Leadership Coach for women entrepreneurs, podcast host, writer, international retreat leader, and champion of women, based in Charleston, SC. Emily believes that when women embrace and express their deepest soul calling and become leaders of their life and business, we create a more liberated and limitless future for ourselves, each other, and our world.

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The Truth About Being Stuck & How To Get Un-stuck — FAST!

March 24, 2015

Last Tuesday, I had a sister circle call for my Sisterhood Mastermind with 2 of the other women in the group. I had a serious breakthrough on this call, thanks to my sisters, that I have been feeling very “stuck” lately. I had felt it, but not fully identified (or admitted) it for awhile. Awareness is key.

I’m sure that you’ve felt this way before. Like your life is unmanageable or unfulfilling in some way. You feel like nothing you do works to get you un-stuck, and like you’re just spinning your wheels and not going anywhere.

For me, it was all revolving around my living situation and wanting to find my place in the world. But of course, we live a whole LIFE, not one distinct area at a time, so this issue was spilling over into my business and I was also feeling stuck about how I wanted to be in service, and what the specific problem is that I solve for my clients. My relationship was also suffering because I was considering a big, fast, drastic move to another city, asking my boyfriend to drop his whole life and just go with me, even though we’d both never been to the place before. WHAT?! Too much!

This is my least favorite feeling in the world! But, at the same time, I know it’s necessary at times.

If we didn’t see the dirt, we wouldn’t know it was time to clean house, would we?

These moments give us such a great window that we can open for ourselves, and an awesome opportunity to really take stock of what’s been happening lately. It also gives us the clue to look to our bigger picture vision to see whether we’re living in alignment with that.

STUCK is really just feeling So Terrified that the Universe Can’t Kickstart.

What do I mean by that?

Every time I’m feeling stuck, I get this restless feeling that I have to do something BIG, which is usually something waaaaaay outside my comfort zone.

Without fail, each time I act on that urge, I create a breakthrough into “unstuck-ness,” and things begin to flow again. It feels like I’m unleashing the floodgates for whatever I desire to come into my life, and it’s finally be able to enter. It typically does so at record speed, so much faster than I could imagine.

*I like to attribute this divine guidance to the universe. Whatever you choose to believe in as the higher power, great — just substitute your word for it whenever I say “universe.” 

Each time I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone, it’s like the universe swoops in and becomes my safety net. It’s such a beautiful thing.

This concept reminds me of one time when I went to Costa Rica in college to study sustainable architecture & design. We had a day on a zip lining course, through and above the treetops of beautiful Monteverde. It was one of my favorite days of our trip…. until we got to the end of the course. We walked across a skybridge, and noticed that it ended and there was a steep drop-off. Then, we found out that we’d be doing a “Tarzan Swing,” which is basically you, your harness, and a rope teaming up for a 120-foot free-fall, until the rope catches you, and you swing back and forth a few times.

I was TERRIFIED to do it. Totally way way out of my comfort zone. I thought there was a pretty big possibility that I could die – who said the rope was safe, anyway!? But at that point, it was the only way down from the course. I would have been stuck if I didn’t do it. I like to think of the universe like that rope. You know it’s there, but it requires a lot of faith and trust to believe it will actually kick-in at your time of need.

The problem is that we can get so scared that it won’t, that we end up not taking the leap. But the leap – stepping off the skybridge into the unknown – is the signal that calls the universe to kickstart, and get its powerful self to our rescue!

So the point here is, if you’re feeling stuck, you HAVE to take a calculated risk. Something that’s outside of your comfort zone, that helps you get closer to your bigger-picture idea of what you ultimately want your life to look like.

Ask yourself: “If I want my life to be the way I envision it being, what is the action I need to take now to get closer to that ideal?”

If an answer doesn’t come right away, don’t freak out. Give yourself some quiet space to have the breakthrough into clarity around this action.

In my experience, things become more clear when I speak to people who are supportive & positive, or who might be a few steps ahead of me in terms of living their ideal lives. When I speak to a coach, I always receive much more clarity and guidance about 10x faster than I could have on my own. Exercise, meditation, journaling, reading, talking with friends, … also great options for quieting the mind or guiding it away from overthinking the matters at hand.

After speaking to a coach and my sisters all in one day, I decided to re-book my flight out of San Francisco next month to leave a week later from San Diego. In the same day, I found a generous friend to stay with in San Diego (not to mention, her house is actually beachfront, which I didn’t realize at first!), a cheap flight from SF to SD, and realized how many incredible women I know virtually but have yet to meet in person, as well as friends I haven’t seen for a few years, who live in California in the areas where I’ll be staying! It’s going to be a trip of a lifetime, and I can’t wait to experiment and see what my daily life might look like if I do decide to move. It’s like my little lifestyle beta test!

What kind of breakthrough are you looking to create, and where are you feeling stuck? Let’s talk about it in an Empower Session, 1:1.

Don’t forget to schedule your 1:1 Empower Session with me to discuss how we can help you navigate your breakthrough with flying colors and lots of confidence!

I can’t wait to talk to you soon!

Love & Light, 


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