sexy soulful success
Hosted by Emily Cassel
A few weeks ago, I hosted a Sister Circle call on Google Hangouts with a few of the amazing women I have the privilege of serving through my Freedom Is Sexy program and Private Leadership Coaching. It was inspiring, deep, luscious, and definitely got intimate and vulnerable!
*If this sounds like fun to you, let’s chat! I have a very limited number of spots available for private coaching clients, and only take on a small and highly curated group of women at once so I can fully dedicate myself to supporting them. Sign up for your complimentary session HERE.
One topic that came up in our conversation was scheduling, and having a lot on our plates.
As ambitious women, we tend to wear many hats, and on top of that, we have so many things we want to do with our lives to help them become big, full, luscious, intentional, and beautiful!
We want to be able to have an amazing career that we love, see our families and friends regularly, and get to yoga 5 days a week.
We want to read Fiction, go on gorgeous vacations, and cook healthy beautiful Pinterest-worthy meals.
We want to make enough money to buy that sexy black convertible, be swept off our feet by our lover daily, have wild and passionate sex, and have a tantalizing social life that’s adventurous, fun, and full of variety.
We want our homes to be neat and tidy (and impeccably designed + decorated, of course), take care of the cutest puppy in the world, be a super mom, make everyone around us happy and captivated by our natural allure.
AND still have time for ourselves to relax and rejuvenate so we can fully show up and enjoy all of these amazing things that we’ve worked so hard for.
I get it, babe. I’ve been there. And I still find myself going there every now and then.
Our desires are diverse, deep, and delectable. But at times, let’s face it…they can become a little overwhelming.
Am I right?!
It feels like we’re holding the weight of the world, and like we can’t possibly have enough time in a week to do ALL of that, and do it well, especially when your boss knows you can handle anything she throws at you at the drop of a hat (and she sure as hell takes full advantage of that).
One of the biggest struggles in my own transition into entrepreneurship, and so many of my clients’ transitions into a new lifestyle, career, or business, seems to be our schedules.
Specifically, the challenge of where we’re putting our energy, when, and how productive we can be to help us feel that we’re creating actual progress and results that we want to see (as quickly as we want them to happen).
We tend to complete a task, then something else unexpectedly comes up, or our to-do list is a mile long, and we feel strapped for time, and as though we’re not actually getting anything accomplished.
Our boundaries to maintain our work/life balance often become murky and unclear, and we get off-track, then beat ourselves up a bit (or a lot) for not having followed through with the things we KNOW will make us feel energized and inspired.
We can be our own worst critics, especially when trying to get so much DONE and checked-off the list to feel successful and productive.
This approach paralyzes us, and only gets us further away from what we REALLY desire in our lives, because we’re getting all caught up in the minutia, and in doing so, we lose sight of the bigger picture vision.
The bigger vision energizes us to continue creating and taking inspired action, seemingly effortlessly creating results and attracting resources to help us achieve our heart’s greatest yearnings.
We tend to forget that we’re supported, and that everything is working out in our favor. We forget that each situation, challenge, and success is intentionally engineered to help us become the best version of ourselves — the version that is able to live, breathe, and possess all that we desire.
And we also forget that our attention is POWERFUL and that whatever we put our focus on, grows.
I know that when I think about my response to this question, I would start CELEBRATING more!
There’s so much to be grateful for and to get excited about with this empowering frame of everything conspiring in our favor, and that each challenge is just a lesson that’s guiding us toward living our mission more fully and with greater impact.
(or schedule them into your week to create space for them to actually happen!)
Rewarding yourself could be as small as smiling to yourself, or as big as taking a week off from work and visiting somewhere you’ve always wanted to go! Having a dance party, cooking yourself a beautiful meal, taking a bath, going to a concert, + meeting a friend for a glass of wine and dessert are some of my favorites 🙂
Choose the reward, then take action on it. Make the progress happen. Then notice when you start to feel wholesome as you reward yourself.
At the moment you feel the BEST during the reward, answer the following questions. You can do this with someone, in your mind, or in a journal.
What am I celebrating?
Why is that worth celebrating?
Why was it a significant goal? How does that make me feel?
What did I do to achieve this goal?
Who have I become in the process?
Who will I become in the future now that I’ve reached this goal?
Before you go to sleep, make a list of all the things you actually did do that day, including everything from the time you woke up to the time you tucked yourself into bed.
Something as small as packing your lunch still counts!
If you tend to not be able to sleep due to a chattery mind at night, focusing on your to-do list, this exercise could save your life.
I like to call this an “Evidence Journal” because you’re literally creating evidence for what you’ve done instead of feeling like you didn’t use your time well that day.
Even if that’s the cold hard truth, it will help you see where you ARE spending your time and create some incentive to instead spend it on the things that truly matter to you.
Reconnect to the “why” behind all of your hard work!
What would you LOVE to create? What does that passion-sparking vision look like for you?
Write it down, share it with a friend, create a Pinterest board that represents the vision to you, … do SOMETHING to get it out of your mind and into physical form.
Creating a vivid example that you can re-visit when you’re feeling disconnected or too focused on the “how” of your goals will help stoke the flames of creative fuel that will get you into action and creating results.
What are 1-3 areas of your life that you REALLY want to grow, improve, or change right now?
First get clear on what those categories are. Then, on a Sunday evening when you’re sitting down to look at the week ahead and plan, Create a result you’d like to see by the end of the week that would feel like advancement in each category.
Often, we aren’t fully clear on what we’re actually moving toward, and our goals feel insurmountable. So when we can place our attention and focus on creating something with intention, we will activate the conscious and subconscious to actually bring that intention to life.
After clarifying your desired results, Think about 5 actions steps you could take for each result to help further its actualization. Then schedule them into your calendar for the week. These commitments are to be valued just as much as any other appointment in your calendar!
I hope you found these tips and tools useful, sister.
I’d love to hear from you and continue the conversation in the comments below! Feel free to ask a question, share an insight you received, a reflection… anything at all!
I hope that your Tuesday is wonder-filled 🙂
Love + Light,
PS — Keep an eye on your inbox this Thursday!
I’m going to be premiering a new episode of the Sisterhood Spotlight Series with my soul-sister Julia Ford-Carther from The Self Love Formula!
If you haven’t seen it yet, Julia interviewed me a few weeks ago, too! It was so fun, and I couldn’t wait to share it with you! So if you haven’t checked it out yet, click on the video below to catch all the interview-y goodness 🙂
How To Accelerate Your Coaching or Consulting Business Online with Libby Crow
Cultivating A Success Mindset with Tiffany Toombs
Post-Traumatic Growth + Soul-Aligned Leadership with Jennifer Watson
Embodying Pleasure, Health, + Sensuality with Nadia Munla